You know that old saw, ‘How can I miss you if you won’t go away?’ We the people of Planet Earth need to collectively raise our voices in chorus and utter those words to Journey guitarist Neal Schon and his semi-scandalous paramour, Real Housewives of DC “star” Michaele Salahi.
The pair, who infamously hooked up last year despite both being married to other people – him to a bride of just two months, her to vinter Tareq Salahi with whom she crashed a White House state dinner in 2009 – are starring in a new Journey video.
That might be OK if the video for the song “Resonate” didn’t shamelessly embarrass the band, its legacy and any remaining fans by being the schlockiest gropefest this side of Chris Isaak’s “Wicked Game” while boasting all the subtlety of a porn film gang bang.
Oh yes… it also comes from people who didn’t just screw around on their spouses but did publicly – possibly for tabloid gain - with no regard for the humiliation left in their wake.
Yeah, Happy Valentine’s Day suckers.
Look closely and you can practically see the other band members’ wincing when the video’s straight-up performance clips cut to Schon and a barely clad Salahi rolling around on a beach tongue-bathing each other between slow-mo gropes as the scene flips to black-and-white (skip to 2:46 and prepared to be assaulted by a bad case of the icks).
The phrase “get a room already” has never seemed so apropos. Of course, if it’s any consolation, the album the song is drawn from (Eclipse released last year) isn’t exactly setting the world on fire. As Rolling Stone noted, Arnel Pineda's vocals as "distractingly proggy" while Schon “OD's on noodly solos and chugging Nineties-style power chords."
We’ll take that over Schon and Salahi’s oversexed re-enactment of the beach scene From Here to Eternity any day. Sorry, Neal, but from this point forward, we have officially stopped believin.’